Lonely, and horny

I am lonely and horny. There’s no other way to put it. I feel so alone and I am in desperate need of any kind of sexual touch.

I shouldn’t be lonely and I shouldn’t be looking at men, wishing one of them will reach out and take me in his arms. I shouldn’t be because I am married.

I am married and the craziest thing is that I have a good marriage. I mean, we don’t fight. Naturally, like every couple we have disagreements, but they don’t last long and we don’t ever give each other silent treatments.

We get along very well. I will say that we are friends. We don’t hide anything from each other and we are both hands-on when it comes to taking care of our two children.

But there’s no intimacy. None at all. It started during my second pregnancy. It was a really difficult one. I was sickly almost to the end and sex was just impossible. I could barely keep anything I eat down let alone to think about sex.

After the birth, I had a bad tear and took so long to heal. And in the midst of it all, I think I suffered some sort of postpartum depression. It wasn’t like I was diagnosed or anything. But I felt really unhappy, most times detached from everything, including my baby girl, and then asexual.

Our daughter is now four years and the last time I remember us being intimate is a week before I found out I was six weeks pregnant with her.

We have talked about it. A number of times actually. But he doesn’t make any moves towards me. When I make the move, which I’m really clumsy at, he politely declines and just turns to the other side and sleeps off.

I’m afraid he’s having an affair. I know there’s another woman. I haven’t questioned him about it and he hasn’t volunteered information on it, but I know he can’t have been living without sex for more than four years.

But to be frank, I don’t care if he is having sex with another woman. I just wish he will have it too with me. I just want him to touch me.

Now, I’m considering having an affair of my own. But I don’t know how to go about it.

I have lost all my post pregnancy weight and look quite beautiful. I think men find me desirable. I mean I get stares and even a compliment here and there. But how does a woman approach a man and tell him that she wants only sex, and nothing more?

That is my problem.

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Let us pretend that this is a true story and counsel this woman.